Hitting a wall...

As the halfway point in this deployment approaches, all I can think is, "really? we are only HALFway?". Spring can't come quick enough!

It isn't just the lack of help, or missing the company of my best friend, or not getting to watch Daddy play with Nora, that drags down my mood. It is all that PLUS the fact that Phil is lucky enough to be located in the dark ages as far as the modern military goes.

To my Army wife friends: stop reading.

I know that I am not the only one that NEVER gets to skype with her deployed soldier. I know I am not the only that anxiously awaits the 1 phone call a week we manage to get. I know I am not the only one who has NEVER been able to webchat with her hubby while he is deployed. And I know that 50 years ago, hell, 5 years ago the amount of communication we do manage (a few emails a week and 1 call) was a revelation. HOWEVER, when every wife around me seems to be complaining about going 3 days without a call and that the skype (that is used nearly everyday) was choppy and delayed, I often want to scream.

I should be thankful that he is able to call and email at all. I should be thankful he is relatively safe. I should be thankful, but honestly, I'm not. I greedily want more. Our ties feel so fragile and strained from the other side of the world, and not hearing from him, not being able to discuss the day to day, makes him feel even further away.

I am hitting a wall. A big brick wall. I don't want to climb over it or blast through it. I just want to sit down (maybe lay down) in front of it and wait for Phil to come home and help Nora and I work around it. Unfortunately, with a toddler underfoot and a house to take care of, sitting down on the job isn't an option. So, send strong vibes my way that I will get over this halfway slump and power through to the end...6 and 3/4 months to go...