We swore up and down we would never go back to infertility drugs. But as the years ticked on, and no second baby came, the possibility of trying the doctor's way seemed more and more likely.
Last fall I started working with a doc trying to get my hormones and body ready for the infertility drugs. This winter we started. And this spring we have given up. 3 cycles (which was all we set out to try).
While it is was unbelievably hard to put my body through all that, again, and not end the turmoil with another sweet baby, I am so glad we tried. All this time I have been telling myself if I would just"suck it up" and take the medication, then I could have a baby.
Now I never have to wonder if there was more we could have done. Did we try all the drugs, do all the tests and procedures? No. We barely scratched the surface of what the medical field can do for someone with my medical issues. However, that was as far as we were willing to go.
If I have been distant, this is why. For the past 10 months, my body has been in turmoil. My emotions have been all over the place. Keeping up daily tasks has often been a struggle. Travel, phone calls, even email became almost impossible the further we went into treatment. So, it is time to stop. Time to return to myself and my sweet little family.
I will still hold onto that tiny hope that something miraculous will happen without the help of doctors and drugs and schedules. But for now, we added a furry baby to our little family.
Meet Ivy, the French Bulldog.
She: loves to lick and cuddle and run, snores louder than an old man, and is overjoyed by teeny tiny tennis balls.
